Ben and Zane were enjoying a fine sarsaparilla in a town that was certainly big enough for the two of them, when a huge man burst through the saloon doors. Seven feet tall, about 85% lean meat, a belt buckle that said "Angus" and two mean-looking horns, he looked ready to rough up the place. He ordered his whiskey and sat down next to the Cartoncasters. "You boys watch out now," he said, "it's hard living out here, plenty of corrupt politicians and thievin' rustlers. You should be fine as long as you stay close to me, though." He slammed his drink down in one gulp and let out a fierce moo. "Either you ever heard of the Code of the West?"

Operation: CODENAME: KIDS NEXT DOOR: Cartoon Of Deliberately Engineering Nonsense And Made-up Enterprises: Kind Interlopers Develop Systems Neutralizing Every Xenophobic Teenager and Delightful Organization Ordering Regimentation.

The Cartoncasters do not condone bullying the differently-abled, except for one specific person, John Callahan, who wished they would. Suck it, Callahan!

Ben and Zane were loving their vacation in Cappy Town. The music was lively, the sky a clear pastel blue, and the townsfolk easily identifiable by their clothing. It was a real dreamland. As they relaxed, they overheard the townsfolk speak in whispers of conspiracy, a plot to overthrow their tyrannical king by means of their brainwashed warrior, a child soldier from the stars. This Kirby was brutal and efficient, killing and consuming their ruler in seconds. The Cartoncasters were prepared to leave, but Cappy Town went right back to normal, and that escargot wasn't going to eat itself.

New York City: a sprawling metropolis filled with people from every walk of life. Ben and Zane strolled along its avenues and alleyways, trying to take in everything it had to offer. From the tentacled fish vendors to the firefighters made out of literal fire, the city was full of interesting characters. Of course, nothing compared to the singular oddity of a man with no physical abnormalities, no glaring personality flaws, not even an extra arm or eyeball. He wasn't even shouting! In New York! Truly, the Cartoncasters had seen it all.

Ben and Zane heard a hot tip about a cartoon prison yard that was cleverly disguised as an elementary school. Warden Prickly waved away accusations that he was sympathizing with the inmates of third street elementary, but records showed that he himself was once a prisoner there as well. He broke down and told us the whole story; that this prison used to be most tender, but these days it really whomps.Unfortunately, there were technical difficulties during recording, and the audio quality on Zane's side is somewhat worse than normal. Probably those damned kindergartners messing with our stuff.

When Henry agreed to be a co-host of KaBlam, he thought it was just three hots and a cot. Never expected he'd be taking the heat for the corrupt execs representing all the b-list cartoons. Henry was caught in a place where cartoons and comics collided, with him as the collateral damage. He could take it, for a while, but when the Cartoncast came by to grill him on the health and well-being of KaBlam employees, it all came spilling out. "What's it matter, anyway?" he cried. "My life aint worth a thing. Not a thing."Anyway, while we get Henry his meds, let's turn the page and watch Life with Loopy! Yearghh.

Ben and Zane were rooting through the local landfill (like ya do) when they came across a giant robot that nobody had ever noticed before, somehow. They poked and prodded and fiddled with the knobs so much that when a woman from the future came to reclaim it, she couldn't pilot it any more. Now it's up to the Cartoncasters to control it by reviewing old cartoons. But that sounds like work, so maybe they'll just leave the TV on to Wrestlemania while they go out for some cheese steaks.

Things were rough for Sailor Guest ever since her kingdom crumbled around her and the Dark-dimension exiled her into the body of an average girl and friend of the Cartoncast, Kitti. Well, the Cartoncasters weren't going to let Kitti fight against them by herself. Ben and Zane quickly donned matching tuxedos and proceeded to stand around. Heroically.

By Jungle Law, The Cartoncasters were called to court for their crimes against Flash Gordon (specifically, not knowing who he was). Luckily, The Phantom aka The Ghost Who Walks aka Caribbean Attorney acted as their legal representation with the power of ten tigers. Thank goodness for public defenders (defenders).

In a world where direct parental relations are a thing of myth, Scrooge McDuck dares to stand up for the ever-threatened ultra-rich. Ben and Zane offered to record his story for the pittance of a few duck-bills, and were tossed out on their ears. Scrooge knew the three secrets to prosperity: a penny saved is a penny earned, limitless treasures exist in exotic locales, and always watch out for Shia Lebeouf.

On a recent trip to the Norb store, Ben and Zane discussed what it meant to be brothers. As they rambled on, they wandered into a forest, where they discovered something incredible: talking beavers! They asked the beavers all about their lives, but the language barrier was tricky. After a lot of bleating and accusations of being "spooty," the cartoncasters tried explaining that they were scientists, but the beavers had heard that one before.

Deep in their hearts, Ben, Zane, and Cassie feel love so alive. That's why they wandered through downtown Venice, offering their expertise to street urchin and over-eligible bachelors alike. Things got a bit hairy when some monsters came out, but The Cartoncasters were able to slip away when Cassie busted out some fantastic accordion music.

Ben and Zane knew they shouldn't have trusted Dan Graves' offer to spend Halloween night in his spooky mansion, and right they were! The vampire bats and zombie ninjas were bad enough, but Dan insisted on both of the Cartoncasters being present for an entire 80's horror movie marathon. They thought it was over by sunrise, but then he just spooled on some random Sci-fi and Fantasy for good measure. Man, that Halloween felt like it lasted decades.